Here Goes Nothing
Sooo...here goes nothing.
For the past several years I’ve toyed with the idea of writing. I’ve considered a book, articles, blogs - you name it, I’ve thought about it. But each time the inspiration has struck me, I’ve quickly talked myself out of it. My internal dialogue typically sounds something like this:
“You know...I’d really love to share this [experience, lesson learned, memory, etc.]. I should write about it and put it out there for the world!”
I write it.
“What the hell were you thinking!? Who are YOU that anyone would value what you have to say? Stop being such a damned narcissist, nobody cares.” (I know...nice self-talk, huh?)
And then a few weeks ago, right when I happened to once again be thinking about this whole “creating content” thing, I received a message from a friend which contained only a screenshot of an inspirational quote he had seen on Instagram. It quite literally stopped me in my tracks...it was one of those “Hey universe, if I’m supposed to do this, maybe you should send me a sign” (but you never expect the sign) kinda moments. The message was this:
“Tell the story of the mountain you climbed.
Your words could become a page in someone else’s survival guide.”
~Morgan Harper Nichols
So...ok universe...f*cking FINE...I’ll write something. (Insert a belligerent little foot-stomp here because sometimes I’m still a petulant child). But what? What niche should I choose to delve into? Shall I explore travel or Keto/weight loss or talk about my dogs? Or maybe I should throw my hat into the cage match of opinion that is the shooting world. Then there are my experiences in uniform or the challenges I’ve faced as a Veteran. Oooh - I could talk about mental health!
And - true to form - I thought and overthought and went down the rabbit hole until I had ALMOST convinced myself *yet again* that this whole writing thing was a stupid idea.
Until it dawned on me that I don’t have to choose. This is MY thing, right? So..basically...I can talk about whatever the hell I want to talk about! And that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to get as real and raw and honest as I can. I’m going to talk about all of it...everything. One day might be the best damn brunch spot (and Bloody Mary) in Charleston or any of a myriad of travel tips & tricks. The next may be the role that the shooting sports play in my life. And that could be followed by a conversation about how losing 3 friends to suicide in the span of 15 days left me almost catatonic. There will probably be something in there about love and dating in your 30’s, or how trying to lose weight and love yourself (or hell...even just being kind of nice to yourself) in spite of your imperfections is f*cking HARD.
I want to discuss the brutality of being beaten into submission by the bullshit that life throws at you, and the overwhelmingly glorious feeling of accomplishment that comes when you battle back. I’ll share with you my adventures on an upcoming epic road trip and, when storm season rolls around, I’ll take you with me as we head into the devastation wrought by a hurricane. I cannot WAIT to introduce you to some of the amazing people I know, and keep alive the memory of some of the heroes who’ve gone before us.
To be honest, this is terrifying. Red Smith, a legendary sportswriter from the middle of last century, said it best - “Writing is easy. You just open a vein and bleed.” Writing is an extremely emotional and mentally exhausting process for me, but the fact that it’s hard makes me all the more determined to do it, and to TRY to do it well. Essentially, I’m going to try to bleed for you.
Please join me in this undertaking. Please PLEASE engage with me...If there is something you would like to know, ask me. If you think I’m full of shit, tell me. If I’m wrong, fix me. Oh - but if you hated it, just move on. I don’t need you pissin’ in my cheerios, k? Thanks!
So….what should I write about first!?